Ever lied to someone? We’ve all done it. Motivations for lying vary widely, especially among those who lie regularly. However, lying is also a hallmark behavioral symptom of addiction. Perhaps you’ve even been the recipient of a lie from a loved one struggling with substance abuse, yourself. But why do addicts lie? Let’s explore the common connection between addiction and lying.
Common Behavioral Symptoms of Addiction
As we examine the relationship between addicts and lying, it’s a good idea to first address typical behavioral symptoms associated with addiction. After all, addiction looks like more than just substance cravings, physical dependence, or experiencing withdrawal. It’s also linked to certain behavioral patterns, such as:
- Neglecting or missing work, school, or personal responsibilities
- Using substances to get drunk
- Social isolation and loneliness
- Skipping out on outings with friends or family
- Losing interest in activities or hobbies previously enjoyed
- Poor academic or work performance
- Financial troubles
- Stealing money or selling a loved one’s items
- Unpredictable mood swings and emotional outbursts
- Neglecting hygiene and appearance
- Eating and sleeping changes
- Increased aggressiveness or violence
- Engaging in risky, out-of-character behaviors
- Lying to hide substance abuse
Understanding the Addiction and Lying Connection
The behavioral symptoms above can cause all kinds of collateral damage among family and friends of the addict. Yet lying can perhaps be one of the most hurtful, especially when your loved one has been hiding their addiction from you for so long. If you’ve found yourself asking why addiction and lies easily intertwine, you’re not alone.
Lying and addiction often go hand in hand. When someone has an addiction, they don’t want to be found out, so lying helps to keep it a secret. As those with addiction choose to lie to their family and friends, it can create serious issues among their relationships. Learning why your addicted loved one chooses to take that risk and lie, shares VerywellMind.com, can provide you with helpful insight so you can respond more effectively. So, why do addicts lie?
Preventing Confrontation
Addiction and lying coincide due to the fact that substance abuse can be your loved one’s primary coping mechanism for their deeper challenges (various types of trauma, co-occurring disorders, stress, etc.). It’s their go-to way of doing things, so they lie about their addiction to prevent you from confronting them over their bad choices.
Fearing Change
Your loved one may have gotten used to their addictive lifestyle—despite knowing its harmful impact—and choose to lie to cover it up. They may fear that you or other family / friends would demand them to change their ways if the truth was really known. Spreading lies about the extent of their addiction allows your loved one to keep doing it the way they want without disruption.
Enabling Loved Ones
Enabling addiction in a loved one can happen among friends and family. In the context of addicts and lying, this occurs when you know that they’re lying and don’t say anything about it. You let them lie without consequences. Because they think they’re getting away with it—or even that you’re aware of their lies but permitting them—you’re enabling their addiction and lying to continue.
Shame
Addiction in many ways causes people to feel ashamed of their actions and choices. Yet that shame they feel drives them to continue to abuse substances to cope, leading to a vicious cycle. That means your loved one may lie about their addiction to avoid feeling shame or embarrassment as a result of you knowing what’s really going on.
Denial
Denial in addiction is often a point of conflict between the substance user and their friends or family. Often, your addicted loved one can remain in denial about their struggles. Yet perhaps they’re aware of how said struggles are perceived by others (like you), so they lie about their substance use to cover it up, and remain in denial.
Dopamine Dependence
As your loved one develops a chemical dependency on the constant dopamine release provided by their addictive substance of choice, their ability to think rationally may be hampered. This can result in a number of the behavioral symptoms of addiction above. And when they can’t think rationally, it makes sense to lie to get what they want.
Overcome Addiction and Lying With Professional Treatment
If your loved one is struggling with addiction and lying, it’s important to talk to them about it in a compassionate, tactful way. But you can also contribute to their long-term recovery by helping them find a professional addiction treatment program as a next step.
At Sana at Stowe in Stowe, Vermont, our comprehensive drug and alcohol addiction treatment programs heal the root causes of addiction, empowering your loved ones to cope with their challenges in healthier ways. As a result, they can embrace honesty in recovery. To learn more, call us today.
