Season’s greetings…maybe? Though many are ready to greet the season’s festivities, traditions, and gatherings among family and friends, you may feel just the opposite. The holiday season could seem more like holiday trauma, especially if you’re struggling with the long-term effects of childhood trauma or PTSD. Instead of warmth and nostalgia, Thanksgiving and Christmas may trigger traumatic memories that are hard to cope with this time of the year. If so, how can you deal with these trauma triggers during the holidays?
Childhood Trauma and Traumatic Memories
The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) describes childhood trauma as feeling intensely threatened by an event you experience or witness as a child (ages 0 to 18). The types of trauma that may occur can be acute (tied to one singular event), chronic (multiple smaller events over a period of time), or complex (various traumatic events inflicted by someone you know). For many, childhood trauma is often associated with adverse childhood experiences (ACEs), such as:
- Physical, emotional, or sexual abuse
- Living with someone who has a mental illness
- Emotional or physical neglect
- Domestic violence
- Divorce or parental separation
- Having an incarcerated parent
- Substance use in the home
When ACEs happen to you, the ensuing childhood or ACEs trauma can stay with you for a long time. That’s because your developing brain can change in response to the trauma you’ve experienced. And if this trauma is left untreated, you may still be dealing with its effects today, decades after the trauma occurred.
One of the symptoms of childhood trauma in adults is the occurrence of traumatic memories. Some can actually experience memory loss in the form of repressed childhood trauma as their brains “forget” things as a way to cope. Others can continue to experience traumatic memories and other triggers (such as feelings, sights, sounds, or even smells) that remind them of their traumatic childhoods.
A traumatic memory can even feel intrusive, reoccurring as flashbacks that cause emotional distress and physical reactions. (This is actually a common symptom of post-traumatic stress disorder or PTSD). And as the holidays approach, these traumatic memories can create unwanted holiday trauma during the “most wonderful time of the year.”
Unwanted Holiday Trauma
The holidays can be a paradoxical season. It may feel like everyone else is having a great experience with all the festivities, but you may be quietly struggling with reminders of painful past trauma. Consequently, you feel pressure to keep up appearances and fake it like you’re enjoying yourself, too. This however can make the holidays incredibly lonely as you inwardly struggle with holiday trauma or choose not to celebrate due to triggering events.
And triggering events may occur regularly during the holiday season. As they do, you may be reminded of your traumatic memories over and over again. Situations that generate triggering holiday PTSD or trauma can include:
- Seeing family members or old friends who were the source of your childhood trauma
- Visiting places where childhood trauma took place or that are associated with your trauma
- Dealing with extra stressors this time of year that can get in the way of your holiday trauma coping strategies
- Being reminded of the fallout that affected you, your childhood, and your family as a result of past trauma
- Struggling with comparison or not feeling good enough while you participate in family activities
- Being around drinking or substance abuse at home, family gatherings, or parties that tempt you to join in to cope with your traumatic memories
- Feeling overstimulated by the sights, sounds, crowds, and busyness that the holidays bring
SOURCE: Ohio Department of Children and Youth
How to Navigate Holiday Trauma in Healthy Ways
If holiday trauma creeps in this time of the year for you, how should you respond? What can you do to learn how to deal with traumatic memories that will painfully arise over the next few weeks? Preparing for traumatic memories in advance can help you get through this challenging time with your emotional health intact.
However, your traumatic past also doesn’t mean you have to forgo this festive season. Enjoying the holidays in recovery from trauma, a mental health disorder, or addiction is also very possible, too. With that said, here are a few ways you can navigate potential holiday trauma well this time of year:
- Stick with your self-care activities, such as nutrition, exercise, meditation, and plenty of sleep, no matter what other festivities are scheduled.
- Have some healthy coping skills for trauma from childhood handy when triggers arise.
- Create new holiday traditions that encourage and uplift you in place of those that remind you of childhood trauma.
- Set healthy boundaries around any triggering places, events, or even people. Communicate these boundaries to trusted loved ones.
- Seek help from your therapy team or support group, even if you’re traveling.
Trauma-Informed Care and Addiction Treatment
If traumatic memories are a regular occurrence in your life, then you likely have unresolved past trauma that needs to be healed. At Sana at Stowe in Stowe, Vermont, our drug and alcohol addiction treatment programs utilize trauma-informed care to address both your trauma and your addiction at the source. If you’re ready to heal your trauma and addiction struggles simultaneously, call us today. You can also take our free childhood trauma test as a first step to get clarity on the presence of ACEs in your past.
